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Dr. Gerard M. Nadal: Science in Service of the Pro-Life Movement

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Sacrificial Love

July 28, 2011 by Gerard M. Nadal

Union Major Sullivan Ballou

We are now in the 150th Anniversary of the events of the United States Civil War, of which I have been a devoted student for many years. Many have drawn striking parallels between the abolitionist movement and the pro-life movement, myself among them. From time to time over the coming months, I’ll be revisiting some of those men who fought that fight, and from whose sterling example I draw strength and inspiration for our abolitionist fight, and pray that ours, unlike theirs, may always remain a bloodless war–fought in the arena of moral and scientific erudition.

On July 14, 1861 on the eve of the Battle of Bull Run, Major Sullivan Ballou of Rhode Island wrote a letter to his wife, Sarah. It is perhaps the greatest expression of love I’ve ever read, on many levels. Here is an excerpted reading of the letter in Ken and Rick Burns’ towering documentary of the Civil War. The far-richer full text of the letter follows.

July the 14th, 1861
Washington DC

My very dear Sarah:

The indications are very strong that we shall move in a few days – perhaps tomorrow. Lest I should not be able to write you again, I feel impelled to write lines that may fall under your eye when I shall be no more.

Our movement may be one of a few days duration and full of pleasure – and it may be one of severe conflict and death to me. Not my will, but thine 0 God, be done. If it is necessary that I should fall on the battlefield for my country, I am ready. I have no misgivings about, or lack of confidence in, the cause in which I am engaged, and my courage does not halt or falter. I know how strongly American Civilization now leans upon the triumph of the Government, and how great a debt we owe to those who went before us through the blood and suffering of the Revolution. And I am willing – perfectly willing – to lay down all my joys in this life, to help maintain this Government, and to pay that debt.

But, my dear wife, when I know that with my own joys I lay down nearly all of yours, and replace them in this life with cares and sorrows – when, after having eaten for long years the bitter fruit of orphanage myself, I must offer it as their only sustenance to my dear little children – is it weak or dishonorable, while the banner of my purpose floats calmly and proudly in the breeze, that my unbounded love for you, my darling wife and children, should struggle in fierce, though useless, contest with my love of country?

I cannot describe to you my feelings on this calm summer night, when two thousand men are sleeping around me, many of them enjoying the last, perhaps, before that of death — and I, suspicious that Death is creeping behind me with his fatal dart, am communing with God, my country, and thee.

I have sought most closely and diligently, and often in my breast, for a wrong motive in thus hazarding the happiness of those I loved and I could not find one. A pure love of my country and of the principles have often advocated before the people and “the name of honor that I love more than I fear death” have called upon me, and I have obeyed.

Sarah, my love for you is deathless, it seems to bind me to you with mighty cables that nothing but Omnipotence could break; and yet my love of Country comes over me like a strong wind and bears me irresistibly on with all these chains to the battlefield.

The memories of the blissful moments I have spent with you come creeping over me, and I feel most gratified to God and to you that I have enjoyed them so long. And hard it is for me to give them up and burn to ashes the hopes of future years, when God willing, we might still have lived and loved together and seen our sons grow up to honorable manhood around us. I have, I know, but few and small claims upon Divine Providence, but something whispers to me – perhaps it is the wafted prayer of my little Edgar — that I shall return to my loved ones unharmed. If I do not, my dear Sarah, never forget how much I love you, and when my last breath escapes me on the battlefield, it will whisper your name.

Forgive my many faults, and the many pains I have caused you. How thoughtless and foolish I have oftentimes been! How gladly would I wash out with my tears every little spot upon your happiness, and struggle with all the misfortune of this world, to shield you and my children from harm. But I cannot. I must watch you from the spirit land and hover near you, while you buffet the storms with your precious little freight, and wait with sad patience till we meet to part no more.

But, O Sarah! If the dead can come back to this earth and flit unseen around those they loved, I shall always be near you; in the garish day and in the darkest night — amidst your happiest scenes and gloomiest hours – always, always; and if there be a soft breeze upon your cheek, it shall be my breath; or the cool air fans your throbbing temple, it shall be my spirit passing by.

Sarah, do not mourn me dead; think I am gone and wait for thee, for we shall meet again.

As for my little boys, they will grow as I have done, and never know a father’s love and care. Little Willie is too young to remember me long, and my blue eyed Edgar will keep my frolics with him among the dimmest memories of his childhood. Sarah, I have unlimited confidence in your maternal care and your development of their characters. Tell my two mothers his and hers I call God’s blessing upon them. O Sarah, I wait for you there! Come to me, and lead thither my children.

Sullivan

32 year-old Major Sullivan Ballou died at the Battle of Bull Run 150 years ago today, July 28, 1861.

May God rest the souls of all who fought that tragic fratricidal war, and bring our modern day abolitionist movement to a fruitful and peaceful conclusion.

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Posted in Abortion, Dignity | Tagged Letter to Sarah, Sullivan Ballou | 6 Comments

6 Responses

  1. on July 29, 2011 at 2:06 AM Sue Joan

    Wow, this blog is very touching and also reminds us of the bigger picture. Thank you so much for sharing this!


  2. on July 29, 2011 at 7:46 PM Maryg

    Lovely.


  3. on July 30, 2011 at 4:09 PM California Yankee

    *wipes away tears*

    Wow.


  4. on July 31, 2011 at 6:31 PM MaryCatherine

    quite beautiful indeed.
    How is that we have lost this beauty in our society? 😦


  5. on August 1, 2011 at 4:25 PM chowderhead

    “How is that we have lost this beauty in our society?”

    Start Civil War II, with a very high casualty rate, and we’re sure to find it again!


  6. on August 1, 2011 at 5:38 PM Gerard M. Nadal

    Actually, the casualty rate stands at 53 million dead babies and the mothers lied to but the abortion industry. That’s plenty of casualties right there. Let’s hope the rest stays bloodless.



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